Providing care for someone you love who is no longer able to take care of his- or herself produces a wide range of emotions. It's natural to feel sadness and grief for your loved one's losses and for the loss of your own previous life. More emotions may surface after you've been a caregiver for an extended period of time or the amount of care increases. You may have days when you feel:
Angry and resentful
Guilty and impatient
Ashamed and lonely
Sorry for yourself
Fearful of the future
Some of these thoughts may shock you or seem "bad" (Why do I have to do everything for her? I wish I could just get away and not have to deal with this any more!).
These feelings aren't self-centered or wicked. It is a normal response to the extreme changes that providing care brings to your life. Someone who says, "I never resented a moment of it," probably isn't being honest about the realities of caregiving.
As a caregiver, you donate a great deal of your time and energy to someone else's needs, and often ignore your own. When difficult emotions surface, remember that you have your own needs. Let your feelings of resentment prompt you to do something for yourself - even if it's only taking 10 minutes to watch the birds, read a magazine, listen to a favorite song or just meditate.